Relationships can be the most amazing aspects of a person’s life, but they can also be destroyer of happiness. When relationships do take a turn for the worst they can be incredibly difficult situations to overcome. Rather than dwelling on the negatives however, why not use these experiences from your love life to avoid ending up in a similar situation in your working life?
Whilst many relationships can be incredibly complex, there are some very common relationship problems which many couples encounter. Here are three popular dilemmas, how they can be likened to working life, and how to prevent them happening in your career.
The Jealous Lover
In this situation you have a possessive partner who wants to monitor your every move and spend every living hour with you. When you do spend time with other people who are important to you they may become jealous and grind you down until you shut them out of your life. You’re generally both miserable, but you’re too scared to end it as you’ve isolated your support network and your partner craves the control over you.
How to apply it to your career: If you work a great deal of hours you may feel like your job is taking over your life. Some workers do overtime to gain extra money, but this should always be optional. Sometimes bosses pressure their employees to take on extra hours outside of their contract during busy periods and whilst it is “optional” the worker may feel they don’t really have a choice in the matter.
If you feel you’re working too many hours speak to your employer as you could be compromising your health and home life if you’re overworked. Your boss may draw up a rota which means you’re not working extra hours every week to give yourself a break.
The Rocky Period
In some relationships it really is all or nothing – you’re either blissfully happy or downright miserable. You may describe your relationship to people as: “when it’s good it’s amazing, but when it’s bad it’s almost unbearable”. Relationships like this are hard to leave behind as you reminisce of those amazing times and often struggle to calculate whether the good times outweigh the bad.
How to apply it to your career: In some jobs, particularly those where you have to take risks, your happiness may fluctuate enormously. For example, doctors who have to make a decision which holds a patient’s life in the balance has the ability to make them feel overwhelmed with success or a complete failure.
If you live for the adrenaline then by all means stay in your job but make sure you have an adequate support network for when times are hard. If you’ve had a setback at work it’s important to enhance your mood with other parts of your life; have a catch-up with an old friend or a day out with family to rebalance your mood.
Cheating
This is perhaps the most common relationship problem that almost everyone has encountered; whether you’re on the receiving end, are the guilty party or have picked a friend up after they’ve been betrayed it seems the world is filled with love rats! It’s possibly the most hurtful and damaging relationship problem and it’s often difficult to rebuild the trust you had before.
How to apply it to your career: You can often feel that same sense of boredom in a job that was maybe the initial problem in your relationship. Complacency can cause the mind to wander and you may have thoughts such as “could I do better?” and “Am I appreciated enough?” and often crave more of a challenge. This may cause you to apply for other jobs whilst still in your current position, which are new and exciting.
Although looking for other jobs whilst you’re currently employed isn’t forbidden, you’ll want to leave your current job on civil terms. You may require a reference off your employer in the future which could land you your dream job. Before leaving hastily, ask if there are any more challenging positions within your organization. If you do decide to leave however, make sure you work your notice period. Although the employer can’t really do anything if you don’t work your notice period, they may refuse to give you a reference which could compromise future job opportunities.
Love lives and careers are both huge aspects of people’s lives and can often be turbulent. There are many things which can be learned from relationship experiences, you may even thank those love rats that you’ve had such experiences when you’re excelling in your career!
Stephanie Staszko writes for Blue Octopus flat fee recruitment specialists who help job seekers to find their dream job and employers to streamline their recruitment process. You can always drop Steph a line on Twitter @StephStaz where you’ll also find more careers posts.
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